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Cedric Benson Vs. Ryan Grant

Welcome to tonight’s Packers running back debate featuring Cedric Benson and Ryan Grant.

Television stations throughout Wisconsin were very upset that the last presidential debate between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney drew a 0.0 rating. That’s right, not a single person tuned in to watch the presidential debate in Wisconsin. 

Research by Nielsen suggested that most television sets were tuned to highlights of the Packers 28-27 win over the Saints, or simply turned off because the weather was nice and people would rather stare at trees and grass than either presidential candidate.

Whatever the reason, Wisconsin television stations need to recoup the ratings that were lost during the debate and the there’s only one tried and true method to make that happen: Packers talk. 

Specifically, a Packers debate.

Tonight’s debate features present-day Cedric Benson vs. Ryan Grant in his prime. They will be debating who is the better running back. Remember, this is present-day Benson and Grant in his prime (late 2007-2009). We’re not focusing on overall career arcs or anything like that. We’re only focusing present-day Benson and Grant from late 2007 through 2009. 

Without further delay, let’s turn it over to our moderator, ALLGBP.com staff writer and the only undefeated team owner in the ALLGBP.com fantasy football league, Mr. Adam Czech.

Moderator: Welcome Mr. present-day Benson and Mr. in-his-prime Grant. Here are the rules for tonight’s debate:    Read more... (1418 words + 1 image, estimated 5:40 mins reading time)

• Don’t swear. The youth of America is watching.

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Surviving Sunday with no Packers Football

Instead of kicking off this edition of Surviving Sunday with the usual long, rambling dissertation on the Packers or football, I’ll start things off with an important life lesson for our younger readers.

I am 3o years old. I went out last night and could barely get out of bed this morning. Those four 16-oz. Surly Cynics I consumed must have went straight to my head and morphed into a giant hammer, which is now pounding away at my brain.

In four hours, I will be going out again. More Surly will be consumed. Probably some other stuff, too (don’t worry, the “other stuff” is perfectly legal). I’ll likely be going out on Sunday, also.

Thirty is way too old to go out drinking on multiple nights during the same week. I have no idea why I’m trying to pull off three days in a row. I might never recover. My family might have to put me in a nursing home on Monday.

Back in my college days, three straight days of drinking was considered a warm-up for the weekend. Now that I’m 30, it’s considered a death sentence.

If you’re still in college or far enough away from 30 to still enjoy going out and getting crazy, congratulations. Make sure you have fun while it lasts, because when it ends, it ends suddenly.

And the ending isn’t pretty.

On to some Packers news:  Read more... (886 words + 1 image, estimated 3:33 mins reading time)

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Last season AllGreenBayPackers.com received an exclusive peak inside the Packers locker room before they faced the Minnesota Vikings in the Metrodome. Through tireless reporting and source development, we were granted access to the locker room on the first day of training camp last weekend. Here’s what went down.

All the Packers coaches are gathered in the locker room. Mike McCarthy arrives

McCarthy: When are the players supposed to get here? I thought everyone was so excited to have football back. Why are they not in here already?

Winston Moss: They’re all in the Hall of Fame down the street, staring at our Super Bowl trophy. I sent Capers to go get them. The players are frightened by his hair, so they’ll probably come running back here once they see him coming.

The locker room door opens and players start coming in. Rodgers has a perfect tan, and is accompanied by two beautiful young women – one blonde, one brunette – both with tattoos on their lower backs. Tom Crabtree walks headfirst into the wall because he was Tweeting instead of paying attention to where he was going. Ryan Pickett and Howard Green start punching each other over who gets to go through the post-practice buffet line first.

McCarthy: Didn’t we hire an ex CIA agent to spy on these guys and keep them in line during the lockout?

Moss: We actually hired the entire CIA. But Obama got wind of it and ordered his agents to abort the mission. Obama’s a Bears fan, ya know.  Read more... (853 words + 1 image, estimated 3:25 mins reading time)

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NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has to be feeling good about his sport as the NFL lockout ends.

Roger Goodell was asked today if there were any damages from the NFL lockout that need to be repaired. He said:

“Well, I would say from the Commissioner’s perspective, we know what we did to frustrate our fans over the last several months. They want football and our job is to give them football. We think that through a 10-year agreement here, we’ve secured the future of the game to ensure that pledge to bring great football to our fans. I think we have some work to do though to make sure they understand that we are sorry for the frustration we put them through over the last six months, but our commitment is to bring them better football going forward. I think we ought to make sure that we understand that our bond with our fans is probably the primary issue that all of us have to keep focused on, whether you’re a player, or you’re an owner or you’re the Commissioner.”

While Goodell was giving this beautifully crafted and politically correct answer, here’s what he was really thinking:

“Hell no there aren’t any damages! Are you freakin’ kidding me?! We’re the NFL, not the NBA, MLB or NHL. Twitter literally melted into a pile of social networking goo once the lockout ended? ESPN basically threw a party live on the air. The NFL Network is covering this news conference like someone just brokered a peace deal in the Middle East. Fans are more excited for the upcoming football season than for any other season in our league’s history.  Read more... (652 words + 1 image, estimated 2:36 mins reading time)

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