23

June

Surviving Sunday: Packers News, Notes and Links for the Football Deprived

Surviving Sundays with no Packers Football

Surviving Sundays with no Packers Football

LeBron James won his second consecutive NBA title with the Miami Heat on Thursday night and cemented his status as one of the greatest players of all time (at least among sane people).

I hated “The Decision” as much as anyone else, but I’m also over it. I don’t necessarily cheer for James now, but I make sure to appreciate him when I watch him play. James is an amazing, amazing, amazing athlete, and it’s a lot more fun to soak in what he’s able to do on the court instead of just calling him names and hating on him.

Anyway, James’ second title got me thinking: How many more titles will it take for Packers QB Aaron Rodgers to be considered an all-time great? He’s already considered great, but he’s not yet at all-time great status with the likes of Starr, Montana, Brady or Unitas.

Then I started thinking some more (always dangerous): Why do we need to attach an arbitrary number of titles to greatness? If Rodgers keeps producing like he has, but doesn’t win another title, should that significantly diminish how we view him in the context of greatness?

I suppose you have to have some criteria to separate certain great players from other great players in subjective arguments like this one, and titles might be a part of it.

You also have to factor in eras and the rules attached to each era. Defenders in today’s NFL can’t make contact with a WR beyond five yards, hit a QB too high, hit a QB too low, hit any player in the head, or fart too loudly in the direction of the quarterback. How many yards would Montana or Unitas throw for if those rules applied back when they played?

I guess I’m trying to say that while it’s sometimes fun to get into these debates about greatness and which player is greater than the other, don’t forget to actually enjoy the greatness while it’s happening.

Rodgers is on a roll right now. Soak it in.

There will be plenty of time to make comparisons down the road.

Packers News, Notes and Links

6

October

Packers Running Back Debate: Modern-Day Cedric Benson vs. Ryan Grant In His Prime

Cedric Benson Vs. Ryan Grant

Cedric Benson Vs. Ryan Grant

Welcome to tonight’s Packers running back debate featuring Cedric Benson and Ryan Grant.

Television stations throughout Wisconsin were very upset that the last presidential debate between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney drew a 0.0 rating. That’s right, not a single person tuned in to watch the presidential debate in Wisconsin. 

Research by Nielsen suggested that most television sets were tuned to highlights of the Packers 28-27 win over the Saints, or simply turned off because the weather was nice and people would rather stare at trees and grass than either presidential candidate.

Whatever the reason, Wisconsin television stations need to recoup the ratings that were lost during the debate and the there’s only one tried and true method to make that happen: Packers talk. 

Specifically, a Packers debate.

Tonight’s debate features present-day Cedric Benson vs. Ryan Grant in his prime. They will be debating who is the better running back. Remember, this is present-day Benson and Grant in his prime (late 2007-2009). We’re not focusing on overall career arcs or anything like that. We’re only focusing present-day Benson and Grant from late 2007 through 2009. 

Without further delay, let’s turn it over to our moderator, ALLGBP.com staff writer and the only undefeated team owner in the ALLGBP.com fantasy football league, Mr. Adam Czech.

Moderator: Welcome Mr. present-day Benson and Mr. in-his-prime Grant. Here are the rules for tonight’s debate:  

  • Don’t swear. The youth of America is watching.
  • Don’t hit each other. We’re on the same team here.
  • Take your time. We bought like three kegs of beer for the audience and they’ll be mad if the debate is over before they had a chance to drink it all.

The first question: A Wisconsin newspaper recently suggested that Benson might be the best Packers running back since Ahamn Green. So, Is Benson the best running back the Packers have had since Ahman Green? Mr. Grant, you may answer first. 

Grant: Hell no!

Moderator: Language, Mr. Grant. Think of the children. 

Grant: Sorry. No bleepin’ way! Did you see me run in the snow globe playoff game? Did you watch me gain 1,200 yards in consecutive seasons? Did you see how I pass blocked for Favre and Rodgers? Our quarterbacks and receivers might have gotten all the glory, but I fit in just fine with the Packers system and did some really impressive things. Benson is just the current flavor-of-the-month.

3

June

Surviving Sunday: Packers News, Notes and Links for the Football Deprived

Surviving Sunday with no Packers football.

Surviving Sunday with no Packers Football

Instead of kicking off this edition of Surviving Sunday with the usual long, rambling dissertation on the Packers or football, I’ll start things off with an important life lesson for our younger readers.

I am 3o years old. I went out last night and could barely get out of bed this morning. Those four 16-oz. Surly Cynics I consumed must have went straight to my head and morphed into a giant hammer, which is now pounding away at my brain.

In four hours, I will be going out again. More Surly will be consumed. Probably some other stuff, too (don’t worry, the “other stuff” is perfectly legal). I’ll likely be going out on Sunday, also.

Thirty is way too old to go out drinking on multiple nights during the same week. I have no idea why I’m trying to pull off three days in a row. I might never recover. My family might have to put me in a nursing home on Monday.

Back in my college days, three straight days of drinking was considered a warm-up for the weekend. Now that I’m 30, it’s considered a death sentence.

If you’re still in college or far enough away from 30 to still enjoy going out and getting crazy, congratulations. Make sure you have fun while it lasts, because when it ends, it ends suddenly.

And the ending isn’t pretty.

On to some Packers news:

Finley, Jennings (M.D., not Greg), and Seat Licenses

  • Jermichael Finley spoke this week and, as usual, he was great. Packers fans tend to get up in arms whenever Finley opens his mouth and I can never figure out what the fuss is about. Finley has personality. I’ll take a player who’s open and honest over a player who has been programmed by the team to just regurgitate cliches and nonsense. As long as Aaron Rodgers is the QB and Mike McCarthy is the coach, I don’t think Packers fans need to worry about a player like Finley disrupting team chemistry or causing a rift with his words. The QB and coach know how to handle a guy like Finely.
4

August

Overheard in the Packers Locker Room Before Their First Practice…

Last season AllGreenBayPackers.com received an exclusive peak inside the Packers locker room before they faced the Minnesota Vikings in the Metrodome. Through tireless reporting and source development, we were granted access to the locker room on the first day of training camp last weekend. Here’s what went down.

All the Packers coaches are gathered in the locker room. Mike McCarthy arrives

McCarthy: When are the players supposed to get here? I thought everyone was so excited to have football back. Why are they not in here already?

Winston Moss: They’re all in the Hall of Fame down the street, staring at our Super Bowl trophy. I sent Capers to go get them. The players are frightened by his hair, so they’ll probably come running back here once they see him coming.

The locker room door opens and players start coming in. Rodgers has a perfect tan, and is accompanied by two beautiful young women – one blonde, one brunette – both with tattoos on their lower backs. Tom Crabtree walks headfirst into the wall because he was Tweeting instead of paying attention to where he was going. Ryan Pickett and Howard Green start punching each other over who gets to go through the post-practice buffet line first.

McCarthy: Didn’t we hire an ex CIA agent to spy on these guys and keep them in line during the lockout?

Moss: We actually hired the entire CIA. But Obama got wind of it and ordered his agents to abort the mission. Obama’s a Bears fan, ya know.

Players continue arriving. Josh Sitton hits Sam Shields in the neck with a baseball bat.

Shields: What was that for?!

Sitton: There was a giant ugly thing on your neck! I think it’s alive!

Shields: That’s my new tattoo, you idiot! It’s a giant Super Bowl ring! It went viral on the Interwebs!

McCarthy: Alright! Listen up! I’ve had it! Sitton put the bat down. Rodgers tell your, ahem, friends to wait outside. Pickett and Green, nothing but salads for you two. Crabtree, stop Tweeting.

Crabtree: But I’m leading a live-Tweetup on U-Stream in my Google+ circle through the iPad Nick Collins gave Alex Tallitsch called Watch Tom Watch the Packers Show up at Training Camp. It’s live on Cheesehead TV and Cheesehead Radio.

McCarthy takes Crabtree’s iPad, stomps it into a million pieces, then lights the pieces on fire.

26

July

The NFL Lockout is Finally Over: What Roger Goodell was Really Thinking

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has to be feeling good about his sport as the NFL lockout ends.

Roger Goodell was asked today if there were any damages from the NFL lockout that need to be repaired. He said:

“Well, I would say from the Commissioner’s perspective, we know what we did to frustrate our fans over the last several months. They want football and our job is to give them football. We think that through a 10-year agreement here, we’ve secured the future of the game to ensure that pledge to bring great football to our fans. I think we have some work to do though to make sure they understand that we are sorry for the frustration we put them through over the last six months, but our commitment is to bring them better football going forward. I think we ought to make sure that we understand that our bond with our fans is probably the primary issue that all of us have to keep focused on, whether you’re a player, or you’re an owner or you’re the Commissioner.”

While Goodell was giving this beautifully crafted and politically correct answer, here’s what he was really thinking:

“Hell no there aren’t any damages! Are you freakin’ kidding me?! We’re the NFL, not the NBA, MLB or NHL. Twitter literally melted into a pile of social networking goo once the lockout ended? ESPN basically threw a party live on the air. The NFL Network is covering this news conference like someone just brokered a peace deal in the Middle East. Fans are more excited for the upcoming football season than for any other season in our league’s history.

And do you know why? Because this lockout forced everyone to skip the boring parts of the offseason. How great is it that we didn’t have to endure a summer of free-agent speculation or BS stories from minicamps about how this player or that player looks really good running around in shorts and a tank top? Wasn’t it nice not having to read about how Albert Haynesworth or some other criminal in shoulder pads appears “focused” this year and wants to “put the past behind him?” We even managed to keep Brett Favre quiet until I gave him the go-ahead to start his unretirement rumors on Saturday night.